issue 3


STUFF FROM ISSUE #3  Winter ’04 (SOLD OUT) 50 copies printed


The Legendary people of Anderson


Anderson, Indiana; a city of cops, political corruption, polluted rivers, abandoned factories, and unbelievably interesting people. Anderson has had it’s rises and falls over the years. In the 50’s and 60’s we made cars. In the 80’s we had a kick ass punk scene, But now Anderson has nothing, nothing but our legends.


Legendary Person #1


Charlie Chan. If you live in Anderson and have been here awhile you probably already know what I’m talking about, if not I’ll help you out. Charlie can be seen cruising the streets of Anderson (to our knowledge he does nothing else) in his old Maroon Camero Convertible. We all see him quite frequently in and around north Anderson, and we’ve never seen him without his gigantic Chinese smile on his face. His eyes more squinty than they already were do to the abnormality of his constant ear to ear smile. I just think he likes his bitchen Camero but he seems to be saying “Ah AmereeeeKA beautiful country!”


Legendary Person #2


The Garbage guy, is my hero. I don’t think he has a job but he can always be seen slightly hunched back, unshaven face, gangly, and hoboish collecting cans in various parks around Anderson, especially Shady Side. Weither he’s trying to save the earth or just make a living, no one knows but when you he’s not collecting cans he can be seen across the street from the Broadway entrance to Shadyside park. Just sitting there, sometimes talking to one of his numerous fans. Last year he was in the paper for collecting 100,000 cans. Live on Garbage guy! Up with the cans down with the workforce!


Legendary Person #3


Chief. First of all chief wasn’t a person and chief isnt alive anymore. Chief was a dog, a friend, and a hero to all. Sounds corny huh? Chief belonged to an old man who was the janitor of the old Anderson Highschool. The Janitor’s saved up his money until he had enough to send Chief to school. After graduating Chief helped clean up the school and the janitor taught Chief to do lots of cool tricks. Then Chief and the janitor were in the annual Midnight Parade like four times in a row. The janitor would ride a motorcycle and Chief would jump over it and do flips around it. Everyone in Anderson loved Chief the loyal dog of a lonely janitor. One day when Chief and the janitor were up on the roof of AHS cleaning, the janitor threw a piece of garbage off the roof. Chief, loyal top the end but still with only the mentality of a dog, jumped off the roof. SPLAT.

The End


That just goes to show you, no matter how stupid, boring or un-cultured your town seems there are always things that are cool about it and there are always interesting stories and people. Just keep your eyes and ears open and ask around , you’ll find out how lame your town isnt.


Sybilla Gimmick


Interview with the JUNEKILL WARD (part of it anyway) by Sybilla Gimmick


Who is Junekill Ward?


Burd: I play guitar and warble. Jole plays bass and yells some. Ben plays drums and also yells on occasion.


What bands have you all been in previously?


Burd: I’ve been in lots of bad bands that I would rather not think about.

Bent: Letters in English, Mara’akate, Big Cow and the Profits, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Number 4, The Ben Traubs, Pop Lolita, The Threat, Slowhand Robotic Genius.


What are some bands your influenced by?


Burd: I think we were originally influenced by the Kill Rock Stars and Dischord labels back in the early ‘90s. Unwound, Fugazi, stuff like that I guess.


What genre would you consider Junekill Ward?


Burd: I don’t think we’re allowed to be part of any legitimate genres. We usually get shuffled off into noise-pop or something.

Bent: Tough guy four track.


About how many shows have you done so far?


Burd: I couldn’t begin to guess. We’ve been hanging around together off and on for almost 10 years now.

Bent: Lots and lots.


What was your best show experience?


Burd: A Halloween show in 1996 with Ice Nine, Acid Green, and I think Marmoset. I was wearing a dress and a bee-hive wig that I found in my mom’s attic. For some reason we sounded really good that night. A friend of ours videotaped it, but then he accidentally taped over it the very next day. I almost killed him.

Bent: Playing so loud in our cover of “Rainbow Connection” that people left the room.


How long has the Junekill Ward been together?


Burd: I think we started in the winter of 1995. We then broke up in 1998  when Jole moved to Seattle and got back together in 2003 when he moved back.


How did you come up with the name Junekill Ward?


Burd: Obviously it’s a play on leave it to Beaver to a certain extent, but it has sort of double meaning. Technically the term “ward” is in reference to a mental ward, which makes Junekill the name of the ward. That’s why it’s Junekill instead of June Kill. The basic idea is that we’re all living in an insane asylum of a world, but TV is telling us that everything is normal and for some reason we believe it and avoid looking at things the way they really are. Band names should always be annoyingly complex just so you you can have a good long answer ready for when someone asks you how you came up with your band name.


Why did you decide to start a band?


Bent: Woman and money. We hate both of them.


What band would you most like to play with, past or present.


Burd: Unwound, mostly because they had this amazing girl drummer. I like girl drummers. I wish Ben was a girl.

Bent: ZZ top. I think it would confuse their fans enough to make them leave a show and not even remember they came to see ZZ Top and Bob Segar.


What are some of the things you do besides play in a band?


Bent: Everything a normal boy does when he has some time on his hands: work, paint, kiss my girlfriend for the first time in five months, break the internet and look for a new job.

Burd: I try to keep my heart from exploding.


Future goals?


Bent: To eventually break up.

Burd: I would really like to avoid getting cancer.


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310 W. 2nd Street
Anderson, IN 46016

Since FEB. 7th 2006